Challenging Conversations: How to Tell Your Family About Your Estate Plan
Discussing your estate plan with your loved ones may not be fun, but for many, it is necessary. While you are completely within your rights to hide your plan and allow it to come out after your death, doing so could mean leaving your family to deal with the fallout of unexpected estate plan details. If you decide to tell your loved ones about your estate plan, make sure you plan carefully and approach this conversation with care. Working with an Oklahoma City estate planning attorney is one way to decide what you want to disclose and how much information your family needs. Call Entz Burton & Associates at 800-633-7230 to set up a consultation with our team now.
Everyone has their own reasons for disclosing or not disclosing their estate plan. Some don’t discuss it with loved ones because their estate plan is largely what their loved ones expect. Others simply fear the reaction of family members who may not be getting as much as they want. Those who do discuss their estate plan with loved ones often do so to settle any potential issues prior to their passing and ensure that their executor has an easier time of managing the estate in court.
Have a Clear Estate Plan and Know What You Want to Discuss
Before you sit down with your family members to discuss your estate plan, you should have a complete estate plan. If you’re still looking for an attorney, thinking about how you want to split up your assets, or weighing your options, you may want to hold off on the discussion. Your loved ones may have questions, and you want to have answers to them. Furthermore, talking to your attorney can help you better prepare for this conversation.
Choose the Right Setting and People for This Conversation
This probably isn’t a conversation you want to have in an overly public space, but you also may not want to have it at home if you expect things to escalate. A good middle ground might be a conference room at a restaurant, where you can have some privacy but are also free to leave if things get heated. If you don’t expect any blowback, having the conversation at your home may be a suitable option.
Explain Your Intentions and Goals With Your Estate Plan
Whatever your intentions are with your estate plan, communicate them clearly to your loved ones. Perhaps you just want to split up your assets evenly, regardless of where your children are in life and how stable they are. Maybe you are dividing up assets in a way that accounts for each child’s circumstances and current financial stability. You could be interested in supporting a charity that means a lot to you, providing the money your grandchildren will need for school, or safeguarding your assets. Just be honest.
Be Concise But Thorough
This may not be the best time to get into the nitty gritty details of estate planning, since your loved ones are likely just interested in your experience and goals. You can go over the key points of your estate plan, briefly describe the aspects that do not apply to them, and explain how each aspect of your estate plan will play out after your death. Don’t skip anything important, but also avoid turning it into a monologue.
Be Prepared for Emotional Responses
You may get a wide range of responses. Even if your estate plan is straightforward and what your family expects, they may get emotional thinking about losing you and the fact that you are planning for that time. If the estate plan does contain unexpected elements, people may feel honored, disrespected, or discouraged. You don’t have to change your estate plan in response to these emotions, but you should still expect people to react in a variety of ways.
Try to Be Open to Further Conversations
If anyone is being left out of your estate or is receiving less than they feel entitled to, they may have more in-depth questions. This is likely a conversation you don’t want to have in front of everyone you love, so be ready to set up additional times to meet with concerned loved ones.
What should you do if you choose not to disclose your estate plan
Some individuals may choose not to disclose their estate plan to loved ones for various reasons. If you decide to keep your estate plan private, it’s essential to work with an experienced estate attorney to ensure that your wishes are clearly documented and can be carried out as intended. Additionally, it’s crucial to store your estate planning documents in a location that is easily accessible after your passing and to inform your loved ones where they can find them.
Ready to Start Your Estate Plan? Contact Entz Burton & Associates Today
Planning for the future can give you peace of mind and protect your legacy. Let’s discuss your next steps now. Just call Entz Burton & Associates at 800-633-7230 or send us a message online.
Attorney J. Michael Entz at Entz Burton & Associates is an experience lawyer in estate planning law, business formation and asset protection serving the families in Oklahoma City and Weatherford office.
